Hole in the Heart
by snewman1976
Summary: My take on upcoming episode 6x22. What will happen with Booth and Brennan when someone close to them gets shot by a bullet meant for Booth.  Please review.


**Authors Note: Ok I had to jump on the bandwagon and do my version of the much anticipated Hole in the Heart episode.**

Booth had finally stopped pacing and berating everyone in the lab. He stood with jaw clenched and hands shoved deep in his pockets; in one hand the poker chip, in the other his Zippo. He hated taking his frustrations out on innocent bystanders but this case was eating at him. It was beyond personal.

Another of Broadsky's victims lay in the lab, being picked apart and examined. Another dead body on Booth's head. He was going to get him this time. He made a mistake on the first case. Couldn't make the shot on the second. Third times the charm, right?

The squints would find something for him to find him. Assuming that he didn't find Booth first. He had gotten two warnings already. He knew there wouldn't be a third. His first warning was after Paula Ashwaldt killed herself, Broadsky had broken into his apartment and said that he wouldn't hesitate to make Parker fatherless. This time he had at the crime scene of his current kill and told him, "You never hear the bullet that takes you out'.

Booth couldn't let this go, he was already prepared to take a leave of absence to nail this guy. He would stay on his ass. He was not going to give him a chance to kill anyone else. Broadsky knew it and wanted Booth out of the way. If he gets the shot he would take it, but the same went for Booth. He should have taken him out when he had the chance. Booth tried to rationalize that it was the explosion that knocked the sense out of him. He never really knew why he didn't shoot him then.

Now another person was dead and it was his fault. It's going to come down to either him or Broadsky. Only one would make it out of this alive. Broadsky would never come easily, he would fight to the death.

As far as law enforcement went, Booth was the only one with the skills to get this guy; and with the help of the squints, he would have all the information needed. He wasn't going to allow him to kill again.

They just seemed to working to damn slow today. He knew it wasn't their fault. They are methodical and thorough. He was just being impatient. They were all talking but all he could hear at the moment was Charlie Brown's teacher. All he wanted were direct answers, not their scientific babble.

He pulled his poker chip from his pocket and began twirling it in his fingers to help rid himself of nervous energy. He lost his concentration and dropped the chip, sending it rolling across the floor. "Damn it." He growled softly as he bent to retrieve it.

The next thing he knew someone in the lab started screaming, "What the hell." He grumbled, turning to see what the commotion was all about.

He saw Brennan run past him and yell: "Call an ambulance someones been shot."

Booth instantly grabbed his gone and searched the room. Seeing nothing he rushed to where Brennan, as well as Cam, were now kneeling in a pool of blood. All the sounds of the lab jumbled into one noise echoing through his head. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. He stumbled closer until he saw what everyone was freaking out about. The squintern with the long name... Vince or something, lay on the stairs to the platform. His blood flowed down the stairs like a waterfall pooling at the bottom. His eyes stared blankly towards the ceiling. He was gone.

His face transformed into every life lost that Booth had ever been responsible for. He saw the where the young man had been standing, where he had been hit. He then turned to see where the glass had been broken on one of the windows above their heads. 'Broadsky.' He thought. From the angle he could see that the trajectory passed through where his head would have been if he hadn't stooped to get his chip. The bullet was meant for him. Another life lost. He had promised he wouldn't let anyone else die.

Booth stood unmoving as his mind took over and his thoughts raced. 'Why hadn't he taken another shot?' 'A second shot would have taken him out.' Guilt crippled him.

Brennan ran to him with tear filled eyes. Her mouth was moving, but he couldn't here the words. He hadn't noticed the paramedics. He hadn't seen the frantic faces of everyone in the lab looking to him, the FBI agent, for instructions of what to do. He hadn't heard the alarm sounding or the shouts from the security guards as they swarmed in to investigate.

That poor kid just died taking the bullet meant for him.

Brennan grabbed his arm and drug him to her office. Unconsciously his feet moved with her. She pushed him down onto the couch. He stared blankly at her, still not hearing her words.

Finally she slapped him hard across the face and yelled: "Booth!"

Only then did his eyes really register and his ears began to hear.

"I called Hacker, he is sending personnel to assist. Come on Booth, this isn't like you." She was almost frantic now.

"My fault." He whispered. "It should have been me."

She pulled him into a hug and her tears soaked his suit jacket.

A short time later the FBI swarmed the building.

Booth answered the questions of the other agents and his superiors robotically. His brain was functioning well enough to go through the motions and be honest and truthful, but not well enough to remember what they were saying.

Thacker was quite aware that Booth was far from his normal self, he had never seen his best agent in this condition. He searched the room until he found Brennan.

"Temperance, how are you doing?" He asked truly concerned.

Her eyes were still red rimmed, but she had managed to stop her tears by this point. She pulled on her mask and compartmentalized the whole situation until she could find a way to deal with it later.

"I am fine." She said dryly.

"Are you sure, he was your assistant?" he asked

"Yes, I understand that it was a very traumatic experience and that it may have long term effects on everyone here at the lab, but I find that I am fully capable of adapting to the situation ."

"Do you know what is wrong with Booth?" He tried. He knew the two had a close bond and that she may know the circumstance.

"Well he has been quite disturbed by the shooting. I can assume due to preliminary observations that he is upset because the trajectory for the bullet was aimed at his head. Mr Nigel-Murray happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Booth's conscience is struggling with the situation."

"Would you mind making letting him know I am placing him on leave, and I would like Dr. Sweets to evaluate him before hi return to duty? I think he will respond better to you right now."

"Of course. I think that is a wise decision due to his current state." She agreed.

"I will also have a protective detail stationed around his apartment should Broadsky try and go after him again." He added.

"Though I doubt it will be of any use since Broadsky strikes from a distance, I do find your actions reassuring." She responded.

Booth sat on Brennan's office couch lost in thought. She slowly sat down beside him and put her hand on his shoulder.

"Booth, I would like to drive you home now." She said softly.

"No... no... you should be here with your friends. I can get home by myself." He answered without feeling.

Brennan decided to try a tactic Sweets would usually use.

"We are all going home for the day. I find that I don't want to be alone. I have managed to keep my emotions under control but I fear that if I am by myself that I will not have a positive reaction." She rationalized. Deep down she actually was unsure how she would react once away from others.

"Oh... sure Bones. I wouldn't want you to be alone, but I think it would be better if you stayed with Angela and Hodgins." He said.

"No Booth, they are a married couple, they will need to be there for each other. I don't want to be the third tire." She argued.

"Third wheel Bones, third wheel." He corrected. "Bones it just isn't safe. That kid died because I moved. What if Broadsky tried again. If anything... I couldn't... If you..."

"Hacker said he is stationing Agents around your home for protection. I want to be there with you. Please Booth?" She begged.

Booth took a deep breath. He couldn't say no to those eyes.

"Fine. But you stay in the hall until I get all the windows blocked. Understand?"

"Yes" She said quickly before he could change his mind.

When they arrived to Booth's apartment he did as he had said he would. He searched the apartment and then proceeded to block each window so nothing would be visible form the outside. Only when he thought it was safe did he return to retrieve Brennan.

He led her into the apartment, but he was clearly on edge. He plopped down on his couch and dropped his head into his hands.

"Do you mind if I get us a drink?" She asked.

"Yeah... sure... whatever you want." He answered.

She walked to his kitchen, grabbed two glasses and a bottle of scotch. She pored them each a drink. They finished them and then had another.

Booth got up without a word and walked into his room. He returned with one of his T shirt and a pair of sweat pants.

"You should be more comfortable in these. You have blood on your clothes. Go ahead and grab a shower. I'll get one after you." He stated.

She took the clothes and walked towards the bathroom. It pained her to see him so distraught. He didn't seem like the man she knew.

"Do you want to talk? You sit outside the door." She questioned.

"I'm alright." He said. "But if you need me to I will."

Brennan thought for a moment. "Only if you want to."

Brennan went to shower and Booth stayed on the couch. He didn't know what to say. If he told her the thing that bothered him the most, he wouldn't blame her if she walked out the door and never spoke to him again.

Brennan had hoped that he would talk to her. She needed to help him. He was always her rock, always there for her. She wanted to be that for him.

When she finished her shower she found Booth still on his couch with half of the bottle of scotch now gone.

"The shower is all yours." She said, sadness clear in her voice. The only time she had seen him even close to this was when Hannah had refused his proposal.

He got up without a word and headed towards the bathroom. She reached out and grabbed his hand. He turned to look at her and she saw how empty his eyes looked. His eyes were always so full of emotion. She embraced him in a tight hug, tears threatening to fall for sympathy of his torment. He returned the hug half halfheartedly.

He didn't deserve this from her. Her assistant was killed in cold blood because of him. He could have prevented all of this if he had just taken the shot when he had the chance.

She released him and he silently walked to the shower. He stayed in there until the water ran cold. He got out wrapped the towel around his waste and sat on the toilet. Every emotion known ran a gambit in his head. He lost control and started throwing and hitting everything within his reach.

Brennan heard the commotion and burst into his bathroom. He had his back to her, so she grabbed his arm to turn him to face her. He spun with fist raised ready to attack. Brennan's expression changed from concern to shock instantly.

Booth snapped out of it in mid swing. Seeing the look on her face crushed him. At that moment he felt no better than his own father. Hatred for himself in that moment overwhelmed him. He ran from the room into his bedroom and slammed the door. Brennan stood there stunned.

She got her wits about her and walked to his door and knocked lightly.

"Go away Bones. Go home. It isn't safe. I'm not safe." He yelled through the door. She could hear the fear and pain in his voice.

She slowly opened the door. He sat on his bed, head in hands, slightly trembling.

"Please talk to me." She whispered.

He considered this a moment. If he told her, she would know and she could get away and be safe from him. Her safety is all that mattered.

"People are dead and its my fault, Bones." He confessed.

This isn't your fault. You are not responsible for his actions." She counteracted.

Yes... I am. When I went out to that land he bought in my name after he shot the grave digger... I chased him. He blew up that trailer . After I hit The ground I pulled my gun. He stood in front of me and I didn't pull the trigger. I could have and I didn't. I don't know why. My conscience, the fact as I was once friends with him and learned from him. Whatever reason. I didn't do it. So everyone he has killed since then and any that he causes in the future. Their all on me. I am responsible. I am the reason that Vincent died. Me." Tears welled up in his eyes as he spoke.

Brennan's eyes filled as well.

"Booth, you are a good man. You don't take a life unless it is absolutely necessary. I know you carry each life you have taken with you. It isn't your fault."

"You are wrong bones. I am an expert shot I could have hit a knee or any other part I wanted. I didn't do my job. I failed. I saw you today. I saw you break down. I know you are burying it all now. When you allow it through your head, you will see it. You will see it for what it is."

A tear drifted down Booth's cheek. Brennan cupped his face and wiped it away with her thumb.

"I am sad Booth. I am sad For Mr Nigel-Murray, but no matter what you say, I will never believe it as your fault. I feel guilt as well. I feel guilty that even though a very intelligent young man lost his life, I am thankful that it wasn't you." with her last statement Brennan's emotions flowed. Tears streamed down her face.

Booth lost his resolve and pulled her tightly into his arms, doing his best to bring her comfort. He rubbed her back gently in circles. She pulled up her legs and they fell backwards onto his bed. After a few moments, she pulled herself together and looked up into his eyes. She saw so much emotion there.

"Are you still angry?" She asked softly.

"Yes, Bones. I am angry. I am damn well pissed off. This bastard is out there killing people." He growled.

"That's not what I was intending to ask you about." She said sheepishly.

He looked out her a bit confused.

"I am coming to realize that I don't feel the need to be impervious around you any longer." She added, her cheeks flushing slightly.

"Oh... OH... I haven't really thought about it." He declared hesitantly.

She took her chance and closed the distance between them and kissed him gently on the lips. He responded gently. Heat built up inside each of them. The kiss becoming more passionate. He pulled her body closer into him. She let out a soft moan. Their kissing became more heavy, both beginning to pant breathlessly. She moved her hand to the waste band of his sweat pants. In an instant he pulled away.

"We can't do this, Bones." He said still trying to bring his breathing to normal.

"Why not I can see that you are aroused." She stated glancing at the bulge in his pants.

He shifted uncomfortable under her gaze.

"Not now. Not like this." He answered

"People often find comfort in sexual intercourse, or love making as you would call it." She explained.

"Bones, I want our first time to be special. I don't want it to be tainted by tragedy. Your special, our moment needs to be special." Booth said looking deep into her eyes.

Booth could see the doubt in her eyes.

"Bones, like you pointed out, I am aroused. My body wants you very badly right now. If you would have proposed this yesterday it would be completely different. I would take you and make passionate love to you, but tonight, tonight isn't the right time. I may kick myself tomorrow for not being with you, but I feel like that if we did it tonight it would be just sex. I don't want to just have sex with you, I want to make love.

"You deserve more than what I can give you right now. Can you understand that?" He asked with earnest.

"So you do want me?" She asked in a small voice.

"More than anything." he answered, cupping her chin and bringing his lips back to hers ever so gently.

She returned his kiss and they snuggled together. Soon they drifted off to sleep entwined in each others arms.

Brennan woke late that morning to an empty bed. She sat up and looked around and saw an envelope with her name on it laying on his pillow.

_Dear Bones,_

_ I am sorry if I disappointed you last night, that was the last thing I wanted to do. I love you to much to take advantage of you in a time like this. I am sorry I left you alone, but I have a job to do. I have to find him and make sure he can't hurt anyone else. I knew if you found out you would try and stop me or try to come. It is way to dangerous and I won't risk your safety. Please forgive me. _

_ Love, Seeley_

_**Ok well this is where I am ending this. Maybe I will decide to continue it at another time, but not for now. Need to get back to Cave Grave so I can finish it and start the sequel to Letters.**_

_**I hope you enjoyed this. Would love to get some reviews. TY for reading.**_


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